{Friendship Friday} which qualities define friendship for you?

Yes, it's true - I really own only 1 skirt. I used to have about 12 skirt suits for work. When I got too fat to fit into them I gave them all away.

Have never been a billowy dress kind of person. Do I look like that kind of person???? (the answer would be no)

Again, I had about 4 shift dresses (a nice firm cotton) which ended on the knee. Those suited me but I haven't found nice ones recently. The current fashions just don't do it for me.

I am not into flow and non-form fitting fashions... and the one time I stopped to look at a dress recently, my iphone got stolen so I'm taking it as a sign :) HA!

pse pray for my friend, Beth. These Sandy Hook murders have been rough for her because of her son's murder last year.

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So... I'm super-stoked. I have 12 glorious days ahead of me before I see the office again.

I phoned D at about 2 pm and asked him if he wanted to join me somewhere for a coffee. D is not as spontaneous as I am (yes, next to him I look positively unstructured) and only phoned me back 1.5 hours later (when I was nearly home) to say yes.

We had a little coffee date at Bedford (I posted a pic to instagram and FB) and now we've properly planned the days ahead.

I also laid out clothes for both kids for the 12 days ahead.

I just feel better and like I can relax when things are organised.

PS My 2013 goals (all 5 pages of them, but the font is ginormous!) are all ready and printed already.
PPS if you sign up to my newsletter you will get my goals form with word of the year, etc. I really don't mind if you sign up, download, and unsubscribe straight away. My feelings used to get hurt yearrrrrs ago but not anymore. Honestly!

Mrs FF

 

Let's talk about friendship qualities we all want in a friendship.

I did a search on my blog and I wrote a very nice post in 2010 when almost none of you were reading.

Here's the post (pse go read Heather's comment - too cool!) - still all true - but basically I said the qualities I want in a friendship are:

• honesty
• communication and true connection
• reciprocity
• loyalty
• support through good times and bad
• consistency

 And then a few weeks ago I wrote about going from friendship to best friendship. I wrote that my thoughts were chemistry, reciprocal effort and lots of vulnerability were key in that transition.

A lot of you said that these things happen naturally or they don't. Yes, that's true but what were the factors that helped transition you to that state?

Two people don't just wake up one day and say, "oh my word, we're best friends". A series of events happen that lead to the feeling of extreme closeness, right?

M, Louisa, me, Cat

In her book, MWF seeking BFF, Rachel cited some research that said the most important parts of friendship are intimacy, interaction, reciprocity and positivity.

1. Intimacy is what I call honesty, connection and vulnerability.
2. Interaction and reciprocity are the same thing for me.
3. While I haven't used the word positivity, I think it's safe to say that I am not drawn to very negative people. Initially I might try and win them over to help them see some of the good in life but after a while, the energy drain is too much. I have one such friend but I only get together with her a couple of times a year and that's enough :)

So I think I agree with the research plus adding a few more. The honesty and loyalty are non-negotiables for me - comes down to trust, I guess.

What do you think about those specific 4 qualities?

Which qualities define friendship for you?


PS next week I want to read your round up of the year, friendship-wise. Please humour me :)

Here was my half-year recap.