Sarah made a reward chart for Henry. In essence, he was rewarded for not crying in the mornings at school drop-off or something like that and when his complete chart was full, he'd get some or other toy.
BRILLIANT!
We don't have problems with school drop-off but there are many things I wish would go smoother in the mornings.
When K mentioned yet again that she wants earrings (she's been begging me the whole year), I decided to make her a chart with 63 blocks and I told her when that thing was full of stickers, she could get earrings.
Of course C wanted in on the action. So I made him one too.
He's SUPER motivated by goals (like me) and K mostly couldn't care less, except when that board started filling up and she could see the end in sight (there's a real-life goals lesson in there...)
As we speak, Connor is 3 stars away from his trip to ToysRUs and Kendra is about 10 stars away.
I dish out the stars for anything :) (getting dressed without moaning, folding and putting their pjs away, making beds, doing their 5 things (have I spoke to you about their 5 things before? Do you want to know?) but I do have a few rules - I have to observe the activity.
No good them telling me "I helped Teacher C with the tidy-up at school". I want to benefit from the behaviour in my own house :)
I offered them 5 stars each for behaving at the photo shoot. K got all 5 her stars; C got 3.
I don't say "come do this and you'll get a star". I say "don't forget your 5 things" or "who wants to help me sort the laundry?" and then if they do it nicely (good attitude), I'll say, "Kendra, thanks for helping me. I think you need a star (or two if their and our laundry baskets)"
As you can see, easy-breezy; hopefully it's encouraging listening and helping with a good attitude.
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PS South Africans, where can I get K's ears pierced?
Ear piercing....eek! That would be 4 more holes for me to clean and care for! You are brave!!
ReplyDeleteI would love to hear about this 5 thing program. I just started a chart with the ladies. The behavior issues are with HAM but the ladies are in love with it. I'm not entirely sure it will work out for her though.
Claire nearly fell apart today when she was moved down a step! There just might be something to this, at least for one of them. I love that you don't ask. That's my hold up with these systems. I shouldn't have to ask/remind you to earn a reward, it should be of your own doing.
I used sticker charts for my son when he was growing up, but they were short list of about 5 specific things he had to focus on, and each chart was for a week at a time.
ReplyDeleteEach sticker had a small monetary value (25c) and at the end of the week he could add up the stickers and take that amount of money to the tuck shop. Bonus stickers were awarded for really good marks or a certificate from school, and if he lied about completing a task he had to take that particular sticker off.
Earrings???!!! Wow! What a big kid!!! I've always I told the girls they can get their ears pierced "when they're older" (whatever that means), IF they want to. They bring it up from time to time, and they always say, "We can get earrings when we're older, IF we want to, but I don't want to, Mommy." HA! I'm guessing that will change at some point. I remember being like K, SO wanting earrings. (I got my ears pierced for my 6th birthday.) :)
ReplyDeleteWe haven't done reward charts outside of potty training...they got a sticker for no accidents all day...but there was no reward other than a pretty sticker to put on the refrigerator. ;) I know this works for a lot of families...I feel like I'm "saving" it until I need to really affect some behavior.
And yes, of course I want to know, What are their 5 things???
Oh yes, this is how we finally got T interested in potty training just before her 3rd birthday. Before that she was having NONE of it, despite the fact that she had been physically ready for ages. She earned a $27 toy by staying dry for 10 half-days. We've also done charts for staying in bed all night without calling for us, and the reward was a trip to the pottery painting place (which is also fun for me!!). We don't do them often, only when there is SOMETHING BIG I need her to figure out.
ReplyDeleteBTW, I cannot for the life of me figure out how to enable email on my comments. But I have an email button on my blog :)
I tried with Kiara - she wasn't interested, she would take the stars off herself and say "here I don't want it". She isn't goal driven at all! AT ALL!
ReplyDeleteWe have one for Jack now for the potty training but I think he is too small still.I will keep at it. One out of the 4 of them has to get it hey?
I had no need for it with Cameron - he was/is my easy kid!
We had Kiara's ears pierced at my moms beautician but you can get it done pretty much anywhere now.
You can get them done at Punky Fish.. after you sign half your life away on indemnity forms. I tried all the usual jewellers who would not pierce children under 16. Rewards charts worked for a while, until I got bored of them myself.
ReplyDeleteEar piercing usually are done at beauty salons these days. I too have asked around for myself a few weeks back and this is the answer I got. It's about R200 and then you get the earrings as well.
ReplyDeleteI am glad the chart is working for you and your two children. Not working for us
We don't have rewards charts at our place. I won't unless I absolutely have to - for me, I'd prefer N just do the right thing because I asked her to do it. We did have a sticker thing when she just took on potty training though, for a week or so and that was that.
ReplyDeleteI think some pharmacies will do the piercing, or perhaps jeweleries. My colleague had his daughter's ears done a few months ago at a Jeweler.
I want to try the sticker thing with Kade to get his potty training on the go! And now that you mention it the not crying at drop off thing might be a brilliant idea too!
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I love it! I also love that K wants her ears pierced so badly. A & M have asked once or twice, but I am putting them off for awhile. I REALLY need to get the girls more involved with taking responsibilities around the house, so I'm gonna start thinking on this idea.
ReplyDeleteI love that this works for you.
ReplyDeleteDischem is great - they do both ears at the same time.
Oh and that's important because a lot of the little girls get such a shock from the first hole that they do not want to do the second. So both at the same time is the way to go.
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