When she was growing up, her parents ALWAYS had "quiet time" after lunch so they could nap/ read/ sew (in those days her mother sewed all their clothes) and that was how parents in those days "got things done". (MIL is 71 so this was in the 50s)
This conversation happened because D said he was so tired (he is fairly low energy and of course, the kids sap even my energy) because the kids just don't stop.
MIL told us even though they didn't have "modern conveniences" and they cooked everything from scratch, etc. (they did have a maid to help in the house and a gardener/ handyman - this was Zimbabwe back in the day), their lives were slower and there was time for everything, EVEN THEMSELVES.
We decided there and then to re-institute rest times because let it be known, D and I have always been keen on alone time.
How we re-instituted Nap/ Rest Time
It had to be "sold" to the kids but I explained that everybody needs some quiet time to do their own thing during the day. Especially the introverts.
These days, K still sleeps 98% of the time and C sleeps about 60% of the time. I prefer them to sleep (45 minutes only) because I really like non-crabby kids for the supper/ bath drill and I would rather have a slightly later bedtime (7:30 - 8:00).
We separate them (no exceptions otherwise you're wasting your time with twins!) - one in their bedroom and one in the lounge/ sunroom. I used to let one be in the study but then I feel like I can't move around and that doesn't work for me.
If they don't want to sleep, they still have to stay in whichever room and do QUIET things (read, play with a puzzle, draw, colour, etc).
The other day I used that time to read too (DIVINE and oh-so-decadent in the middle of te day) but normally that's computer time for me, or photo album-type stuff where I don't want little hands getting involved and "helping" me.
The key for adult rest time is you have to already know what you want to do during those 45 minutes because they go fast. I plan to edit a folder of photos, write a blog post or two, etc. I know in advance exactly what I want to do.
Anyway, so on holiday, we also have Rest Time. D & K definitely nap, C is 60/40 and I read.
This day, C woke first, found me reading outside and we chatted about the light because I had my camera next to me on the patio table.
We then decided to go for a walk without waiting for the others because it was golden hour.
(These days he tells me, "MUMMY! LOOK! Golden hour!!!")
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| I was sitting right under this lapa |
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| I had to spell some of the message but he wrote one for them. They're going to make my shopping lists soon! |
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| these are my favourite autumn leaves |
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| blurry but I like that I look happy |
Do you have rest or quiet time in your house?
I refuse to let go of quiet time. Naps are hit and miss, but everyone needs some downtime- me especially!
ReplyDeleteOh I love the autumn leave pics! We do try on weekends to have rest time - none of ours sleep anymore although A might from time to time - a few Saturdays ago she slept almost 3 hours! They can have a book or we sometimes all gather in the lounge and listen to a story (not TV - Storieman - CD stories). But it is a challenge.
ReplyDeleteI love the pic of C's writing.. obsessed with little people's writing I am! We don't have quiet time purely because on Saturday and Sunday we are generally on the go. However, I love this age where I can literally say "I want to be alone, please go and find something to do" and they listen and go and busy themselves with something. Hannah falls asleep really quickly and wherever, so if the opportunity arises, she takes a nap whenever she can. Liam can go and go and go and never need to sleep. If they are particularly testy though, I immediately call for quiet time and I agree, they cannot have quiet time in the same room!
ReplyDeleteBeautiful leaves - I am in envy of your quiet time or nap time. I get none of that, and haven't for SOME time now! I miss naps.
ReplyDeleteMy favourite one is the one of you! And the one where Connor is facing away from the camera. Looks like Joel with a hoodie. Rest and QT is a problem in our house. Two of us need it and crave it (ie Joel and I) and the other two are sensory seekers and NEED a lot of noise. When things get to much then we just go to the car and get some timeout there. Or we go to my Mom so we can hide from the noise there.
ReplyDeleteI love, love, love that photo of your little man!!! We have a quiet time and it is as long as I need!!! Straight after lunch, one kid clear the table, one washes the dishes and the rest wander off and read. I read as well, usually a real paper book... time away from screens and just noise!!! Often folk want to come over and play - I always say yes, after 3:30!!!
ReplyDeleteI love the autumn leaves photo just before the one with C holding them in his hands.
ReplyDeleteQuiet times...oh man, I should write a blog post on that subject. The truth is that we only have quiet time when B and Stefan is away. The truth is that she does not have in any routine and he is still running around and throwing tantrums at 9 in the evening. My getting cross about the lack of discipline is not making any impression...and I do hate to be a nag...so I bite my tongue and lose myself in a book.