Finally - D-day

I went for my blood test today and… I am pregnant!!!

BUT before you get all excited... they told me my HCG levels are “lower than we’d like” so I have to go for another blood test on Wed, by which time the levels need to have doubled or more!

Today my HCG level is 57 - how low is this anyway?

Of course, if they drop further then it means bad news.

But I am positive for the first time in a week …………..and I'm telling Baby Bean to GROW!

When she said, "you're pregnant" I said, "you're joking" - really I did. I still feel like it's a dream.

It was SUCH a shock because I took not 1, not 2, not 3, but 4 pregnancy tests – all negative. Now I know why – my levels were too low to detect.

So next update on Wednesday - if you pray, pray for increasing HCG levels.

Today I was good

The discharge stopped sometime last night (which made me very happy even though I still only had one line on that stick) so this morning I decided to be good and not POAS.

Today my boobs are sore again - I don't know if that means anything - but I thought I'd throw it out there.

However, tomorrow I am peeing on that stick again. After all it will have been 48 hours and I read the inserts - they say "if you get a negative, wait 48 hours and test again".

Of course I'm not even supposed to be testing but I'm not patient and honestly, the doctors must know we're going to do it.

My favourite infertility blogger is pregnant. I'm still in shock but very hopeful for the rest of us!

Anyway, good night - I've been reading blogs too long. My head hurts.

I did it again

Yip, looks like I can't stop peeing on those sticks.

This morning I woke up bright and early again and dashed to the loo. Today only one line.

I agree with you, Blythe - it's the medication that's keeping all this at bay. The nurse said to NOT STOP the meds no matter WHAT happens. Okay, I get the picture!

I wrote this on Blythe's blog

I have told myself "if it's over it's over" but thankfully it is still just a brown discharge (TMI, sorry)

The nurse told us that because they pump us full of all these drugs to make our uterus nice and PLUMP! sometimes the ladies will shed a bit of it - it is nothing to worry about.

I will POAS (thanks Debbie for the IVF lingo translation) again tomorrow because our blood tests only get done on the 20th!

Blythe, what's your tummy looking like? Mine is huge and round like a ball - if I wasn't so vain, I'd take a pic!

P.S. I have the BEST girlfriends from the infertility support group - they've been praying and texting me to support me and that part's been great.

Oh dear

Last night I went to the loo and there was a brownish discharge.

My heart stopped and I quickly told DH to turn on the lights (I'm lazy so I go straight to the loo instead of to the light switch first). I decided there and then to jump straight into bed.

This morning I woke at 6.30 (unheard of - my alarm's set for 7.15) and he told me I tossed and turned the whole night (I wasn't even aware because I slept soundly).

I peed on a stick straight away - one clear line and one very faint if you squint and look into the sun line. No discharge.

So far, so good.

But while at work, some more brown discharge. It's almost like I'm getting my periods...

This evening yet some more discharge so we just phoned the clinic (their literature says to phone if you're concerned so I made D phone!) and the nurse said it doesn't mean I'm not pregnant, but if it increases, to phone back tomorrow.

I've cried once since this little blip happened. Otherwise I feel kind of resigned. Today I was looking at the budget and thinking "HOW can we pay for another cycle?"

(I keep telling my little baby bean - you have ME as a parent and I'm a fighter so FIGHT! Shame, poor thing, the pressure!)

Tonight I spent hours reading (happy) infertility blogs - the ones who eventually got pregnant - to encourage me that it WILL happen.

Enough about me. How are you guys doing?