I found a link to this blog on Friday night and have spent HOURS reading each and every post since Angie started her blog in January.
This family is SOOO precious. Through all the tears, I've felt closer to my God than I have in months. Angie is a really good storyteller and you will love reading about her family.
Go read some more about Audrey and do keep the tissues handy...seriously!
Monday, June 16, 2008
Sunday, June 15, 2008
cuteness
Two weeks ago I went for my usual appointment for a face peel.
As I was leaving, I walked along the corridor and saw a little girl of about 3/ 4 dancing in the doorway of (I think it was) the dentist's office.
She looked so happy and alive that I smiled at her and we said "hello".
Then she holds out a hand full of folded up paper and tells me to take one.
So I did.
And I thanked her.
She then says to me, if you hold it over your head, it'll make your hair curly.
(talking her own brand of nonsense as only little girls do :))
That little bit of encouragement and laughter made me think, I can't wait to have my own curly-haired little one, talking nonsense to me.
As I was leaving, I walked along the corridor and saw a little girl of about 3/ 4 dancing in the doorway of (I think it was) the dentist's office.
She looked so happy and alive that I smiled at her and we said "hello".
Then she holds out a hand full of folded up paper and tells me to take one.
So I did.
And I thanked her.
She then says to me, if you hold it over your head, it'll make your hair curly.
(talking her own brand of nonsense as only little girls do :))
That little bit of encouragement and laughter made me think, I can't wait to have my own curly-haired little one, talking nonsense to me.
Thursday, May 29, 2008
The verdict
Well, the verdict's in.
I have blocked tubes on both sides - that's probably why that HSG was so painful!
This doctor says that the sperm morphology is not a problem "we can work with what we have here".........em, okay :)
But the tubes have to be unblocked. Clearly they got that way since the last laparoscopy in 2004 because on my file notes then, everything is still clear.
So he wants to do yet ANOTHER laparoscopy and I'm due to have it done this month. However, they are contracted out of the medical aids which means you pay upfront and claim back later and then the medical aid company will only pay a portion back to you. These guys charge double what my other gynae charged (just in consultation fees) so I'm sure the surgery fees are going to be just as exorbitant.
I have delegated to my husband to check into it with the medical aid to find out how much they will actually pay before I go ahead and book anything.
So that's the latest state of affairs.
I have blocked tubes on both sides - that's probably why that HSG was so painful!
This doctor says that the sperm morphology is not a problem "we can work with what we have here".........em, okay :)
But the tubes have to be unblocked. Clearly they got that way since the last laparoscopy in 2004 because on my file notes then, everything is still clear.
So he wants to do yet ANOTHER laparoscopy and I'm due to have it done this month. However, they are contracted out of the medical aids which means you pay upfront and claim back later and then the medical aid company will only pay a portion back to you. These guys charge double what my other gynae charged (just in consultation fees) so I'm sure the surgery fees are going to be just as exorbitant.
I have delegated to my husband to check into it with the medical aid to find out how much they will actually pay before I go ahead and book anything.
So that's the latest state of affairs.
Sunday, March 16, 2008
Goals
this year we decided to take some action and go see someone else to get a proper opinion of the situation once and for all.
after discussing with my friend, and also explaining the type of person I'm looking for (straightforward, open and to the point), my friend told me to go to her (expensive) clinic, even if just to get the initial consults.
so that's what I did.
I phoned around mid-Jan and only got an appointment on 20 Feb.
In preparation, we had to complete a 9-page document (!) and get any and all copies of our files at the gynae and the other place.
So we got there and immediately I liked the new guy, Dr G.
He went through the file in detail, asking questions here and there to clarify things.
Then he examined me with THE PROBE (disgusting and horrible) and a normal internal. I really HATE those things.
Immediately afterwards, we had to both go get blood tests and then I had to go back on day 2 and 3 of my next period for more blood tests.
DH had to get another sperm test and I had to have an HSG x-ray. I was naive in not googling it because it was SOOOO horrible and sore. On the bright side, maybe it was good I didn't google it because I probably would have been scared off.
When I asked my friend why she didn't tell me it was so horrible, she says hers wasn't bad. So I said, well then that probably means something ELSE is wrong!!! Oy!
Anyway, long story short means that the follow-up consult after the 4 blood tests, sperm test and HSG x-ray is this Thursday when we finally get THE VERDICT.
after discussing with my friend, and also explaining the type of person I'm looking for (straightforward, open and to the point), my friend told me to go to her (expensive) clinic, even if just to get the initial consults.
so that's what I did.
I phoned around mid-Jan and only got an appointment on 20 Feb.
In preparation, we had to complete a 9-page document (!) and get any and all copies of our files at the gynae and the other place.
So we got there and immediately I liked the new guy, Dr G.
He went through the file in detail, asking questions here and there to clarify things.
Then he examined me with THE PROBE (disgusting and horrible) and a normal internal. I really HATE those things.
Immediately afterwards, we had to both go get blood tests and then I had to go back on day 2 and 3 of my next period for more blood tests.
DH had to get another sperm test and I had to have an HSG x-ray. I was naive in not googling it because it was SOOOO horrible and sore. On the bright side, maybe it was good I didn't google it because I probably would have been scared off.
When I asked my friend why she didn't tell me it was so horrible, she says hers wasn't bad. So I said, well then that probably means something ELSE is wrong!!! Oy!
Anyway, long story short means that the follow-up consult after the 4 blood tests, sperm test and HSG x-ray is this Thursday when we finally get THE VERDICT.
Monday, January 21, 2008
Booked off
The first week wasn't great because my movement was very limited, I was on painkillers, etc, etc.
But after that, for the rest of the 4-week recuperation period, it was brilliant.
I'd wake up late, have breakfast, get myself washed and dressed, do some work on the business, watch TV, etc.
I got 2 complete e-products done during that time off and got a good start on a third!
And then, the day my sick leave ended, my real holiday started (annual leave).
So I was off for 7 weeks all in all - lovely! Something I got used to very quickly :)
But after that, for the rest of the 4-week recuperation period, it was brilliant.
I'd wake up late, have breakfast, get myself washed and dressed, do some work on the business, watch TV, etc.
I got 2 complete e-products done during that time off and got a good start on a third!
And then, the day my sick leave ended, my real holiday started (annual leave).
So I was off for 7 weeks all in all - lovely! Something I got used to very quickly :)
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
The operation
Well, the anaethetist and the doctors came by to check on all of us (3 of us to be operated on by my doctor) and the order of the ops was decided.
I was going to be last because mine was the longest op - they were estimating 3 - 5 hours!
My two previous laparoscopies were 3 hours each and this one was a bigger deal. They had to cut me open (like a Caesar cut), cut a portion of my uterus and then sew me back up.
Both the doctor/ surgeon and the anaethetist suggested that they just do a spinal block. I said, "no thanks, I want to be knocked out cold and feel nothing". Despite them trying to persuade me (who on earth knows why?!) otherwise, I kept to my story (I can be very stubborn) and had general anaesthetic.
I was only wheeled to surgery around 5pm (from 12:30 when I arrived) so I was starving and anxious. In fact, the 2nd lady had returned and had woken up from anaesthetic, we'd had a nice long chat and then only did they fetch me.
Everything went well and when I woke, I was soooo whoozy that I actually told my husband to just go home because i wanted to sleep.
Well, the hospital night staff were so noisy that I could hardly sleep and then at around 3am when it finally quieted down, I fell asleep only to have adjoining rooms ringing for the nurses continually.
So I was awake - I sent DH a text message assuming he was asleep, only to get a phone call back so I knew I'd woken him! Eeeeeeek!
Anyway, the next morning, when my doctors did their rounds nice and early (just before 6am), I begged to go home because I said I couldn't rest there because of the noisy nurses.
After they removed the catheter, if I managed to pee okay, that was test 1. And then when I'd had some tea, I didn't vomit. So that was test 2 and thankfully, I was discharged!
Yessss!
I was sore and moved like an old lady but discharged!
I was going to be last because mine was the longest op - they were estimating 3 - 5 hours!
My two previous laparoscopies were 3 hours each and this one was a bigger deal. They had to cut me open (like a Caesar cut), cut a portion of my uterus and then sew me back up.
Both the doctor/ surgeon and the anaethetist suggested that they just do a spinal block. I said, "no thanks, I want to be knocked out cold and feel nothing". Despite them trying to persuade me (who on earth knows why?!) otherwise, I kept to my story (I can be very stubborn) and had general anaesthetic.
I was only wheeled to surgery around 5pm (from 12:30 when I arrived) so I was starving and anxious. In fact, the 2nd lady had returned and had woken up from anaesthetic, we'd had a nice long chat and then only did they fetch me.
Everything went well and when I woke, I was soooo whoozy that I actually told my husband to just go home because i wanted to sleep.
Well, the hospital night staff were so noisy that I could hardly sleep and then at around 3am when it finally quieted down, I fell asleep only to have adjoining rooms ringing for the nurses continually.
So I was awake - I sent DH a text message assuming he was asleep, only to get a phone call back so I knew I'd woken him! Eeeeeeek!
Anyway, the next morning, when my doctors did their rounds nice and early (just before 6am), I begged to go home because I said I couldn't rest there because of the noisy nurses.
After they removed the catheter, if I managed to pee okay, that was test 1. And then when I'd had some tea, I didn't vomit. So that was test 2 and thankfully, I was discharged!
Yessss!
I was sore and moved like an old lady but discharged!
Monday, December 31, 2007
7 random things to end off 2007
Wanttobeamom tagged me for this meme. I haven't been tagged on this blog before so this is fun, fun, fun!
1. I love baking muffins – not cakes or anything else, just muffins. I also only bake drop cookies, not the ones you have to roll out and use the different shapes ;)
2. I am great at interviews – I have always been offered a job once I get to the interview stage.
3. One of my BIG goals is to work in another country for a year.
4. I don’t read infertility blogs very often because they depress me. Strange because I know that if I allowed myself to dwell on the 10% I’d sound exactly the same.
5. I love traveling to other countries but not for the usual reasons like seeing the sights and so on. I love talking to the people and seeing how they live. One of my favourite things to do is to talk to fellow tourists on guided tours. I remember once we went to Australia and because my husband’s not very friendly, we hadn’t been very sociable with people we met until the guided tour on Great Ocean Road outside Melbourne. Then I broke loose and had SUCH fun with people from Germany, Ireland, all over the place.
6. I love cleaning my toilet – I am very fussy with germs partly because I studied Microbiology so I know how quickly those suckers multiply.
7. I grew up in a city with a beach and I can’t swim!
I'm tagging Becky and Char
1. I love baking muffins – not cakes or anything else, just muffins. I also only bake drop cookies, not the ones you have to roll out and use the different shapes ;)
2. I am great at interviews – I have always been offered a job once I get to the interview stage.
3. One of my BIG goals is to work in another country for a year.
4. I don’t read infertility blogs very often because they depress me. Strange because I know that if I allowed myself to dwell on the 10% I’d sound exactly the same.
5. I love traveling to other countries but not for the usual reasons like seeing the sights and so on. I love talking to the people and seeing how they live. One of my favourite things to do is to talk to fellow tourists on guided tours. I remember once we went to Australia and because my husband’s not very friendly, we hadn’t been very sociable with people we met until the guided tour on Great Ocean Road outside Melbourne. Then I broke loose and had SUCH fun with people from Germany, Ireland, all over the place.
6. I love cleaning my toilet – I am very fussy with germs partly because I studied Microbiology so I know how quickly those suckers multiply.
7. I grew up in a city with a beach and I can’t swim!
I'm tagging Becky and Char
Monday, December 24, 2007
leading up to the big day
Once I got over the shock, I decided to get the op over and done with as soon as possible.
Why prolong the inevitable?
I'd already decided to have it done either the 16th or 23rd Nov, depending on work. My boss was "do what you need to do" so I went ahead and booked the 16th, planning to be back at work on 3rd Dec because the doctor said "definitely two weeks off work".
I phoned the doctor to book the 16th and so the countdown began.
It was really strange though because even though I'd had 3 surgeries before (wisdom teeth and the 2 laparoscopies), I was so scared that I was going to die. Don't know where that came from - honestly.
I didn't even tell my sister and mother that I was having the op! And at work, I told my boss and my colleague who is in the next cubicle, but nobody else.
Pretending that it wasn't happening, I suppose :)
So they told me to be at the hospital at 12:00 as he starts operating at 13:00. No food after 8:00.
I went into work for about 2 hours because I was interviewing people for a position we have vacant (I'm really good at interviewing so am always involved in recruitment of staff in our division).
Then raced home to shower and shave (!). We only left for the hospital at 12 so we were about 25 minutes late and of course, the first nurse I saw on the ward said, "are you Mrs F?"
Me: "Yes, I am, how did you know?"
"We've been waiting for you!" (oh my word)
Stay tuned for part 3
P.S. Merry Christmas!
Why prolong the inevitable?
I'd already decided to have it done either the 16th or 23rd Nov, depending on work. My boss was "do what you need to do" so I went ahead and booked the 16th, planning to be back at work on 3rd Dec because the doctor said "definitely two weeks off work".
I phoned the doctor to book the 16th and so the countdown began.
It was really strange though because even though I'd had 3 surgeries before (wisdom teeth and the 2 laparoscopies), I was so scared that I was going to die. Don't know where that came from - honestly.
I didn't even tell my sister and mother that I was having the op! And at work, I told my boss and my colleague who is in the next cubicle, but nobody else.
Pretending that it wasn't happening, I suppose :)
So they told me to be at the hospital at 12:00 as he starts operating at 13:00. No food after 8:00.
I went into work for about 2 hours because I was interviewing people for a position we have vacant (I'm really good at interviewing so am always involved in recruitment of staff in our division).
Then raced home to shower and shave (!). We only left for the hospital at 12 so we were about 25 minutes late and of course, the first nurse I saw on the ward said, "are you Mrs F?"
Me: "Yes, I am, how did you know?"
"We've been waiting for you!" (oh my word)
Stay tuned for part 3
P.S. Merry Christmas!
Sunday, December 23, 2007
that's not supposed to happen
I'm about 5 weeks behind on posting to this blog so best I get my act together before I forget everything!
we went away for a long weekend at the beginning of november and while away, I started getting a very familiar feeling of pain BUT at the wrong time.
The pain was my familiar period pain but only thing is, it was nowhere near my period. It could have been around ovulation but who knows because I have weird 21-25 day cycles.
I still had some Nurofen in my bag from my period so took all that and then had to get some more. That meant that something was up because I really only have pain at period time.
we got back on a sunday night and didn't even bother making an appointment on the Monday morning; I just went straight into the gynae and she could see me.
I figured that she needs to see what's going on while I'm in pain so that whatever it is shows up on the scan. Usually by the time you see them you're all better again, right?
Anyway, the long story short is that she asked me to come back in the afternoon to let her partner (husband) give a 2nd opinion and he said I'd have to have surgery.
*shock*
I've had two laparoscopies before (all in the pre-trying days amazingly enough) for endometriosis but this one would have to be an actual cut (Caesar cut), not the little snips like before.
He also said that it was not urgent; depends how much pain I felt I could stand and how quickly I wanted babies because I'm not going to be falling pregnant like that. Nice!
So off I went back home to think about things, plan dates around work and holidays, etc.
Stay tuned for part 2!
we went away for a long weekend at the beginning of november and while away, I started getting a very familiar feeling of pain BUT at the wrong time.
The pain was my familiar period pain but only thing is, it was nowhere near my period. It could have been around ovulation but who knows because I have weird 21-25 day cycles.
I still had some Nurofen in my bag from my period so took all that and then had to get some more. That meant that something was up because I really only have pain at period time.
we got back on a sunday night and didn't even bother making an appointment on the Monday morning; I just went straight into the gynae and she could see me.
I figured that she needs to see what's going on while I'm in pain so that whatever it is shows up on the scan. Usually by the time you see them you're all better again, right?
Anyway, the long story short is that she asked me to come back in the afternoon to let her partner (husband) give a 2nd opinion and he said I'd have to have surgery.
*shock*
I've had two laparoscopies before (all in the pre-trying days amazingly enough) for endometriosis but this one would have to be an actual cut (Caesar cut), not the little snips like before.
He also said that it was not urgent; depends how much pain I felt I could stand and how quickly I wanted babies because I'm not going to be falling pregnant like that. Nice!
So off I went back home to think about things, plan dates around work and holidays, etc.
Stay tuned for part 2!
Saturday, November 24, 2007
Touched
we had our end-of-year party at the infertility support group on 12 Nov.
It was so lovely to see everyone just relaxing for a change. My friend couldn't come with me but I went alone anyway (I was so proud of myself for driving all that way alone).
we decided to exchange gifts so we each brought a small gift to exchange. I got gift wrap, ribbon, gift tags and an advent calendar - just my idea of a perfect clutter-free gift :)
then the lady who hosts the monthly gathering announced that she and her co-host bought a piece of jewellery to be given to a different lady every time we met, so that we'd know that we have people who understand our situation and that support us in our journey. isn't that sweet?
But wait! (I sound like an infomercial :)) then she says the first recipient of this beautiful silver heart pendant is ME! Because she's been inspired by my calmness and peace and faith in God through this whole crazy ride.
And wow - I could NOT believe it. We really don't know what people are thinking of us and our testimony.
One thing I have said to my hubby from the beginning (after I started accepting things) is that one day when this dreadful journey is over, I'm writing a Christian book on infertility. So I can let people know they're not alone (even though it feels like the whole world has babies without even trying :)) and use what I'm going through for good!
But can you believe it - me!
It was so lovely to see everyone just relaxing for a change. My friend couldn't come with me but I went alone anyway (I was so proud of myself for driving all that way alone).
we decided to exchange gifts so we each brought a small gift to exchange. I got gift wrap, ribbon, gift tags and an advent calendar - just my idea of a perfect clutter-free gift :)
then the lady who hosts the monthly gathering announced that she and her co-host bought a piece of jewellery to be given to a different lady every time we met, so that we'd know that we have people who understand our situation and that support us in our journey. isn't that sweet?
But wait! (I sound like an infomercial :)) then she says the first recipient of this beautiful silver heart pendant is ME! Because she's been inspired by my calmness and peace and faith in God through this whole crazy ride.
And wow - I could NOT believe it. We really don't know what people are thinking of us and our testimony.
One thing I have said to my hubby from the beginning (after I started accepting things) is that one day when this dreadful journey is over, I'm writing a Christian book on infertility. So I can let people know they're not alone (even though it feels like the whole world has babies without even trying :)) and use what I'm going through for good!
But can you believe it - me!
Tuesday, October 09, 2007
Another one of those!
A girl here at work is pregnant. Three months.
Lovely person - only 25/26 - her second. Her first-born is the MOST GORGEOUS CHILD ever. He is ultra-friendly and loves hugging everybody.
I asked her if they were trying (because we are friendly with one another) and she said yes.
"The first month nothing happened and then the second month I was pregnant"
Oh the joys!
It sucks. It really does. I'm happy for them but it freaks me out that mostly everybody can get pregnant at the drop of a hat!
Lovely person - only 25/26 - her second. Her first-born is the MOST GORGEOUS CHILD ever. He is ultra-friendly and loves hugging everybody.
I asked her if they were trying (because we are friendly with one another) and she said yes.
"The first month nothing happened and then the second month I was pregnant"
Oh the joys!
It sucks. It really does. I'm happy for them but it freaks me out that mostly everybody can get pregnant at the drop of a hat!
Monday, October 08, 2007
Thank you
Thank you for all the wonderful comments on my post the other day!
I literally sat with my mouth wide open, amazed at the kindness and thoughtfulness of you bloggers!
I've made a list of all the great book suggestions too and can't wait to start reading.
BTW, support group tonight again :)
I literally sat with my mouth wide open, amazed at the kindness and thoughtfulness of you bloggers!
I've made a list of all the great book suggestions too and can't wait to start reading.
BTW, support group tonight again :)
Wednesday, October 03, 2007
WFMW - pregnant questions
It's backwards day over at Shannon's place and today, I get to ask you some questions!!!
We have been diagnosed with infertility.
Please give me some good answers to the perpetual so when are you two starting a family? question.
I'm not a sarcastic person but I would like a clear, assertive response! :)
We have been diagnosed with infertility.
Please give me some good answers to the perpetual so when are you two starting a family? question.
I'm not a sarcastic person but I would like a clear, assertive response! :)
Friday, September 28, 2007
Support group 2 - Sept
When I was checking to see if the previous post looked okay, I realised that I didn't tell you about the second one.
Well, it was on 3 September already! *shock*
We were a smaller group than last time and because I knew most of those people from last time, I was a lot more comfortable.
Even when I got the questions!
Because the fact is, we're believing God to heal us and having sex. That's it!
For most people, this means we're doing nothing. But I've gotten okay with that. I have realised that every situation is different and so is every couple. And I just don't feel okay with IVF right now. I don't disagree with it; I just don't think it's for us. I don't know if it ever will be.
And this time, there was a lady who was similar to me. She said she knew she could never go through with IVF and just decided to forget about the whole baby thing (due to personal reasons - someone close to her got very sick). Four years later, she was pregnant and now has a gorgeous son.
So I felt like I wasn't that weird.
The other day I read on Boho's blog about how she found the medical experience after her laparoscopy for endometriosis so cold. And so one-sided in that they almost force you to just go for heavy-duty IVF while you're still reeling from the shock of the whole thing.
Of course, I relate so well.
She got lots of support in the comments and fortunately, she's very strong so I know she'll stand up for what she believes is right for her body and family.
Next group will be first week in October and I've told my friend I'll go again.
Well, it was on 3 September already! *shock*
We were a smaller group than last time and because I knew most of those people from last time, I was a lot more comfortable.
Even when I got the questions!
Because the fact is, we're believing God to heal us and having sex. That's it!
For most people, this means we're doing nothing. But I've gotten okay with that. I have realised that every situation is different and so is every couple. And I just don't feel okay with IVF right now. I don't disagree with it; I just don't think it's for us. I don't know if it ever will be.
And this time, there was a lady who was similar to me. She said she knew she could never go through with IVF and just decided to forget about the whole baby thing (due to personal reasons - someone close to her got very sick). Four years later, she was pregnant and now has a gorgeous son.
So I felt like I wasn't that weird.
The other day I read on Boho's blog about how she found the medical experience after her laparoscopy for endometriosis so cold. And so one-sided in that they almost force you to just go for heavy-duty IVF while you're still reeling from the shock of the whole thing.
Of course, I relate so well.
She got lots of support in the comments and fortunately, she's very strong so I know she'll stand up for what she believes is right for her body and family.
Next group will be first week in October and I've told my friend I'll go again.
Um, remember me?
I've been so pathetic at posting to this blog, it's unreal!
I've thought of closing and deleting this blog so many times but something keeps me leaving it open.
You see, I'm venturing out of the closet very slowly and I must say, it's FREEING! Yes, there are lots of questions but the people who are comfortable talking to me talk and the others kind of mumble a platitude and leave it at that. Which suits me just fine!
The only thing is I don't know how to handle the questions.
So where are you guys with treatment? Um, nowhere
Well, what are you doing? Nothing
Then there's the confused look to which I give a sweet smile that says, that's enough for now :-)
I've thought of closing and deleting this blog so many times but something keeps me leaving it open.
You see, I'm venturing out of the closet very slowly and I must say, it's FREEING! Yes, there are lots of questions but the people who are comfortable talking to me talk and the others kind of mumble a platitude and leave it at that. Which suits me just fine!
The only thing is I don't know how to handle the questions.
So where are you guys with treatment? Um, nowhere
Well, what are you doing? Nothing
Then there's the confused look to which I give a sweet smile that says, that's enough for now :-)
Sunday, August 12, 2007
Support group
I can't believe how long it's been since I wrote on this blog - shocking!
I went to my first support group nearly 3 weeks ago. I went with my friend and altogether there were about 14 of us there - some 3 with secondary infertility and the rest battling to have just one.
It was a very interesting evening!
On the one hand it was really good to know that we are all in the same boat. I know the stats, 1 in 6 couples battle to have a baby, but the thing is, I don't know where these 1's are all hanging out! And whether they have unexplained infertility, male factor, female factor or both.
So hearing all the ladies' stories was very good. Every condition under the sun was represented there.
On the other hand, it was very draining to hear all the stories. I function well about 95% of the time and try to live as full a life aside from this as possible. So to hear all of this for 3 hours straight is a bit much for me. We were crying and laughing together. It was just very emotional.
But here's the thing I want to write about:
I noticed as the ladies were sharing that there was a common thread - control! We all exhibited some serious control freak tendencies and I kept thinking, "surely I'm not that bad". It was the strangest thing - I could see how some of them were battling and yet I kept thinking, "I am nowhere near as bad as all of these guys."
Or maybe that's my problem - I'm just avoiding the topic and these ladies are actually doing something about their infertility. I don't know. I'm still not sure that I'll go back but I'll let you know.
Blog kindness
Someone on an infertility blog got pregnant and she offered up her books to anyone who wanted them. So I commented and she sent them to me. Two gorgeous thick books and some chocolate (for the PMS) which I am sharing with my friend. I am so touched at this lady's kindness - she doesn't know me from a bar of soap and she refused to let me pay for the postage!
BTW, my friend has resigned from work so that she can de-stress and focus on getting pregnant!
I went to my first support group nearly 3 weeks ago. I went with my friend and altogether there were about 14 of us there - some 3 with secondary infertility and the rest battling to have just one.
It was a very interesting evening!
On the one hand it was really good to know that we are all in the same boat. I know the stats, 1 in 6 couples battle to have a baby, but the thing is, I don't know where these 1's are all hanging out! And whether they have unexplained infertility, male factor, female factor or both.
So hearing all the ladies' stories was very good. Every condition under the sun was represented there.
On the other hand, it was very draining to hear all the stories. I function well about 95% of the time and try to live as full a life aside from this as possible. So to hear all of this for 3 hours straight is a bit much for me. We were crying and laughing together. It was just very emotional.
But here's the thing I want to write about:
I noticed as the ladies were sharing that there was a common thread - control! We all exhibited some serious control freak tendencies and I kept thinking, "surely I'm not that bad". It was the strangest thing - I could see how some of them were battling and yet I kept thinking, "I am nowhere near as bad as all of these guys."
Or maybe that's my problem - I'm just avoiding the topic and these ladies are actually doing something about their infertility. I don't know. I'm still not sure that I'll go back but I'll let you know.
Blog kindness
Someone on an infertility blog got pregnant and she offered up her books to anyone who wanted them. So I commented and she sent them to me. Two gorgeous thick books and some chocolate (for the PMS) which I am sharing with my friend. I am so touched at this lady's kindness - she doesn't know me from a bar of soap and she refused to let me pay for the postage!
BTW, my friend has resigned from work so that she can de-stress and focus on getting pregnant!
Monday, July 09, 2007
Oh my word
Thanks so much for your comment the other day.
I phoned my gynae to check how I'm supposed to take the progesterone and she says from day 14 to 28 each cycle. I've just been taking them all along so I stopped immediately!
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In other news, my sister has asked me to be her son's godmother. I'm not into all this traditional stuff but I know it's a big thing for her so I graciously accepted :)
LOL - at least I can still laugh. Right?!
I phoned my gynae to check how I'm supposed to take the progesterone and she says from day 14 to 28 each cycle. I've just been taking them all along so I stopped immediately!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In other news, my sister has asked me to be her son's godmother. I'm not into all this traditional stuff but I know it's a big thing for her so I graciously accepted :)
Sister: A and I would like you to be K's godmother
Me: What does that mean? I have to look after him if you die?
Sister: Leigh!
LOL - at least I can still laugh. Right?!
Sunday, July 08, 2007
Normal again!
So the entire period lasted 5 days instead of 11 days.
Pain? Only took 6 Nurofen instead of my usual 16 - 18! Huge, huge victory.
The progesterone is clearly working.
Does anybody know if you're supposed to take the progesterone every single day of your cycle or just on days 14 - 28?
I will phone the gynae but just thought I'd ask. I thought it was every single day but don't know why I'm now doubting!
Pain? Only took 6 Nurofen instead of my usual 16 - 18! Huge, huge victory.
The progesterone is clearly working.
Does anybody know if you're supposed to take the progesterone every single day of your cycle or just on days 14 - 28?
I will phone the gynae but just thought I'd ask. I thought it was every single day but don't know why I'm now doubting!
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
For the first time in a year
I am having a normal period!
The progesterone has probably worked because I am on track. I had a 29-day cycle - haven't had anything beyond 21 days for a year, and before that, it was 25-26 days max.
And the period started immediately (not a week of nothingness like before).
So things are looking up :-)
The progesterone has probably worked because I am on track. I had a 29-day cycle - haven't had anything beyond 21 days for a year, and before that, it was 25-26 days max.
And the period started immediately (not a week of nothingness like before).
So things are looking up :-)
Friday, June 22, 2007
Baby stuff
I read this gorgeous post on babies that I wanted to share with you and I asked the lady to please pray that this is my experience too.
And then... there's an interesting discussion going on at Tertia's blog. Be sure to read comments - that's where it all starts.
What do you think?
And then... there's an interesting discussion going on at Tertia's blog. Be sure to read comments - that's where it all starts.
What do you think?
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