I remember getting in my car, not feeling the slightest bit of guilt, instead feeling like I finally got to escape the madness.
It was wonderful!
Not so much the exercise but the freedom of being by myself without having babies, bags, bottles, blankets, etc. all attached to me.
I had a thought at the time: I know I should feel guilty because I've waited so long for these two, but I actually don't.
So the me time has been wonderful and since then I've made good use of having a day nanny and I escape the madness every 2 - 3 days.
Back to this morning.
I love, love, LOVE grey, overcast skies.
Like this one...
Is there anything better than driving along in no traffic listening to love songs while gazing at those grey skies?Seriously - it's like a bit of heaven!
So even though I didn't feel like going to gym after nearly a month of being away (I have some valid, but flimsy, excuses: my knees are buggered and I've had a cold), I knew I had to because...
- D reminded me that I still have to get in my 4 sessions this month to keep my special membership rate.
- I'm 0.8 kg away from my pre-pregnancy weight! Amazing because it doesn't look like it. I've decided that it all shifts around so I probably have thinner ankles or something :) because my bum, thighs and belly weigh a lot more than 0.8 (1.76 pounds).
- I was seriously annoyed and needed stress relief. (a) Night nanny woke us at 5.20 this morning (she actually works til 7am) announcing that she needed to leave to get to her new full-time job. We'd discussed this last week and I told her we need her til 7 otherwise we need to get someone else. (b) When I checked The Notebook, I saw Kendra had had tiny feeds of 25ml and 40 ml during the night because no-one except D and me has the patience to make her finish her 75ml feed. (c) The (newly sterilised) bottles were all standing open on the kitchen counter top. What is the use of sterilising bottles if you leave them open for all the germs?!!!
Of course I felt calm and stress-free afterwards too.
Now here's the thing:
On Sunday my MIL announced that she was coming over. So I said to D that I'd be going shopping (I love walking the shopping centre all alone!) which he agreed would be good for me.
My MIL arrived, I spent about 30 minutes here doing some chit-chat and then I said I'm off to the shops.
What for? she says. All judgemental.
Because I have things to do, I said. (I really only had one thing to do)
I could not believe the tone.... and had to bite my tongue for the good of the family dynamic...but I gave D a look :)
So what is it with people?
Do they think mothers have to be all martyr-ish and stay at home all the time???
(this is my contribution for the 30-minute blog challenge and I made it!!!)
P.S. A year ago today I found out I was pregnant with my chemical pregnancy from IVF1
HA! That's like my MIL informing me I handle my children like rag dolls! Never mind the fact that she lives in her chair and has to be handed the babies! She only means well I believe!
ReplyDeleteI went to the mall today with D in his pram. He cried a lot and really there was nothing wrong with him, he was just over-tired. You should have seen the looks I got from the people I walked passed. One lady - who I had to stop for otherwise I would have rode over her - said the sarong I used to cover the front of the pram was on his head and that was why he was crying. Duh.. everyone has an opinion on what I should be or shouldn't be doing and why wasn't I at home tied to my baby. I say you've got to keep yourself happy and happy you means a happy family and happy babies.
ReplyDeleteI have to agree with Nat - EVERYONE has an opinion, don't they? Yet only you are the mama to those wee ones. Taking care be aware of meeting the very real needs that you do have allows you the freedom to be the best mommy you can be to your children.
ReplyDeleteI hope your Sunday out turned out to be restful and restorative after all.
Ha! My MIL whinged that our baby was too sleepy and why wasn't she more awake. I pointed out that she was prem and needed sleep. And yeah, everyone has an opinion.
ReplyDeleteTime out rocks. I don't think it's bad to not feel guilty. Carrying all that baby crud around for one baby, let alone 2, is not *normal* after a life free of that clutter. On that note - do you reckon that you could sometimes get away with one of those mini diaper clutch things? That's saved my sanity on a number of occasions.
Nice work on the weight front. I'm impressed :)
Night nanny - grrrrr. She's being paid to have patience, it's not like she's doing it for love like you two.
You take care of you no matter what. (((Hugs)))
ReplyDeleteFYI I am a IVF mom too!!!
Saffy, I can get away with less – when we go to the doctors I throw their things in my normal bag – I need to blog and show the progression. Used to go out with a ginormous bag but have scaled down dramatically.
ReplyDeleteYou’re right about the night nanny – I have decided to treat both of them (day and night nanny) as employees and tell them their KRAs (key result areas).
“your job will be considered successful when K takes a full feed every 3 hours” – they are going to hate me!!! But we ARE paying good money!
Oh Megan, it soooo restored me!
And you’re right – when I’m away for a short time, I actually look forward to coming back home and seeing them again!
Natalie, what did you say to the forward lady? Now that’s why I don’t want to take poor Kendra out.
I am starting to get RUDE – but I do start my sentences with ACTUALLY____________!
I'd tacked the old biddies and their interfering from a gushy sweet as pie "Wow thanks so much for caring but...." approach :) I reckon that'd shut them up ;)
ReplyDelete