Something I never thought I'd ever be writing about

I'd totally not even thought about de-worming until the first comments came through on yesterday's post...

and then I went "duh"

I remember when I went to the Toddlersense Seminar (which I still haven't written about 3 months later) the lady mentioned that once babies start crawling and playing outside, they should be de-wormed every 6 months.

My kids were 14 months at the time so were well overdue and I made a note in the manual.

However, that doesn't help if you don't take out the manual to look through it again, something I am particularly bad at, and which is why blogging is so good for me as it helps me process and work through my notes.

So yesterday afternoon I went to buy the de-worming medicine and started my kids on it.

La la la la la - that's me not thinking about worms as I get gooseflesh just from thinking about it!

From the other comments (go read them all - they are fantastic - in fact, the best writing is often in the comments, if you don't normally read them), I gather that this de-worming thing is mostly South African.

Who knew?!

I will definitely ask both Sr Carla and Dr S about it next time I see them, just for interest's sake.

So the de-worming is happening, I think I'm going to avoid the Pediasure for now (I've googled it after Rachel's comment) and take them back after a month.

My kids do eat more oils than we do - full fat everything, avocados, oily fish, etc.

I will also make the appt with the paediatric nutritionist, just in case. But I really hope it's just worms as they are really happy and healthy and I don't want to create other eating issues because of this!

So many people (blog comments and people in real life, like my English colleague) have told me that South African medical staff are unduly obsessed with the weight charts and, after this, I tend to agree.

90-day goal for the babies - get this weight thing sorted out

What are your 90-day goals for your babies/ kids?

Expert vs mother's instinct?

So, on Friday my beautiful babies turned 18 months.

I was changing the toys around and they thought it would be fun to jump in (C) and on her brother (K)

We had their vaccinations scheduled (I like things done exactly on the day, if at all possible) with my wonderful Sister Carla and if we're not seeing our paed Dr S, I always get a wellness check done too.

He only wants to see them again at 21 months (6 months out from the 15-month check-up) so that's what we had done.

Kendra
Weight 8.258 kg
Height 76 cm
Head circum 46.6

Connor
Weight 10.630 kg
Height 82 cm
Head circum 48.8

When she weighed Kendra, she double-checked her scale because K has lost weight. There is a funny moment though as she said, "I think it may be wise to have her seen by a paediatric nutritionist" and K's eyes popped wide open as did her mouth as if she knew what was being said. Funny little girl!

Sr Carla is very level-headed and totally practical and normal so that gave me pause!

Connor has also lost weight and that's where I start to doubt myself.

I could have SWORN they are both a kilo heavier (they certainly feel that way, esp. K) and even though I looked at the scale myself, I can't believe it.

They both eat like horses except for those 3 days K was a vegetarian on holiday (but then she still ate cereals, yoghurts, breads, etc.). My mother even said, "gee, these children eat a LOT" - they really do.

So, I know beyond a shadow of doubt we're not starving them - they are eating all they want to because they tell us "more, more" when they're still hungry or just want more of things they like (mealies/ corn, carrots, peas).

Here's K signing more (I can't remember for what, but obviously not for food. Maybe kisses?)

I told her they're VERY active but she said still, they should be gaining very, very slightly, or even staying the same, but not losing weight.

Back to Kendra
12 months - Sr Carla - 8.293
15 months - Dr S - 8.04 (at the time he said there must be something wrong with her scale :))
18 months - Sr Carla - 8.258 (even though a gain from 15 months on Dr S's scale, still a 35 g drop in 3 months with a 1cm increase in height)

and back to Connor
12 months - Sr Carla - 10.936
15 months - Dr S - 10.8 (consistent with K's measurements so def could be scale :))
18 months - Sr Carla - 10.630 (he's lost weight on both Dr S's scale, and Sr Carla's scale with a 4.5 cm increase in height)

Now here's the thing - I am not about to start feeding them oily, sugary food just to make them gain weight as that just goes against everything I believe in, AND it will set them up for bad eating habits in life.

I have already started feeding them supper-type meals for both lunch and supper (usually they have a sandwich for lunch with fruit) and that's as far as I'm prepared to go, for now.

We got a referral to a paediatric nutritionist but I'm leaning towards trying this for a month, then going back to weigh them at Sr Carla's and then only going to see this other lady.

I honestly, HONESTLY don't think there's a thing wrong with them. In fact, I think they're perfect :) In my view, they eat lots of good, nutritious food, enough milks, etc. and I really just think we've caught them at a growth spurt.

D has always been worried about our little K and his natural instinct is to rush to this nutritionist but he's agreed to go with my way for a month. He thinks we should maybe even make the appt now as you do tend to wait to see specialists.

But what do you think? Should I worry? Have you experienced anything like this?

I also thought it was over and done with

Last week as she's running out the door Nanny V tells me she needs to go renew her asylum.

No urgency about it, nothing.

So I said something like, "what were those THREE DAYS about then?"

She tells me that while they're waiting for their work permits to come through, their asylum permits still need to be current.

So I said we'll speak about it later in the week.

Totally forgot and she didn't say anything til Thursday night.

Again running out the door.

She says, "so what about tomorrow?"

And then only tells me her asylum permit expires on Friday and she has to go renew. And, if they renew after the permits expire, they have to pay more. (She earns a good salary by other nannies' standards, but of course, not in comparison to us, so I feel a twinge of guilt.)

Now I feel strong-armed (which I hate!) and I can't think clearly and my dear son is screaming from the bedroom as I was supposed to let V out quickly and then get back to him to pray, close curtains and turn on the sleep music. MandyE, do you like that they are children of routine?

So I tell V I can't think straight but we are both not prepared for tomorrow (Friday last week) and we will phone her later.

After the babies are prayed over and settled, I go find D (who is STILL sick!) and tell him the story.

He also freaks out which warms my heart a bit because I now know I am not being totally unreasonable.

We agree to have supper to cool down and think rationally.

We then agreed that if we give her the day off, she needs to come and work on the Sat as we had taken these extra days off to have some "couple time" which now gets messed up with this new plan.

D phones her (him being slightly more rational than me) but can't get through at two different times, so eventually we send her a text which my phone later tells me is undelivered. Grrr.

Friday morning rolls around and V comes to work.

I hear D talking to her about this whole business and telling her she can leave (7:30) and go do her asylum but she says it's too late because the queues will be too long.

And that's how we left it.

So again, we have just discussed, plotted and planned and here is the new plan. D's mom will come babysit (she is actually being really good about it as she is on leave) on Friday morning, and I will take yet another half day and relieve her for the afternoon shift.

D asked me why I'm still so cross about this.

I don't know why exactly but I feel like it's because of lack of communication and planning, and she always talks to me about these things as she's leaving and then I'm forced to make these split-second decisions.

That and the fact that I thought I never have to think about this work permit/ asylum thing ever again!

So tomorrow I am putting my word of the year to the test and I will take courageous action and talk to her about how

1) if she knows she has to talk to me about something, to tell me in the morning so I can come home early enough (before the supper/ bath time craziness) so we can talk properly

2) she needs to give me ALL the details and not spring it on me at the last minute (like the fact that she now has to pay more for this asylum permit)

3) we also have jobs and can't just spring things on our bosses as there are meetings scheduled, work deadlines, etc.

Are you better at thinking on your feet than I am? How would you have dealt with this?

Reverb - week 3. Or 21 down 10 to go :)

December 15 – 5 Minutes. Imagine you will completely lose your memory of 2010 in five minutes. Set an alarm for five minutes and capture the things you most want to remember about 2010. (Author: Patti Digh)

• how awesome it felt to be sleeping again
• how good it is to be on top of my game at work, without the mushy brain of new motherhood
• the sense of acceptance and okay-ness I had when I read Motherstyles
• the cuteness, awesomeness, love, laughter that we've shared with K & C
• how far I've come along in letting go
• having some truly awesome coaching clients who have achieved great things (books! and other)
• being on TV
• speaking for Big Corporate
• the beach holiday
• the beauty of Clarens
• the ease of the photoshoot
• meeting and connecting with so many wonderful people all over the world through this blog

(I set my timer for 5 mins; only a minute and a half have elapsed but I'm done)

December 16 – Friendship. How has a friend changed you or your perspective on the world this year? Was this change gradual, or a sudden burst? (Author: Martha Mihalick)

This is a tough one.

1) There is my friend M with our "triplet". Every time I'm tempted to complain I remember what she goes through with her M and I get grateful for our healthy babies. She's unknowingly changed my perspective to always be grateful that my two don't have to go for the 3 or 4 therapies M goes to on a regular basis. Remember they were all 3 born at 32 weeks so it could so very easily have been us.

2) Friendship in general has been 1 part wonderful and 4 parts horribly disappointing. I'd say I had quite a rude awakening this year and have mulled over these things far too much. Like why do people not seem to care about me as much as I care about them, etc, etc. Very draining!

I'm learning (very slowly, I might add) that I just need to let go. Let go of expectations, let go of yearning, just let go.

December 17 – Lesson Learned. What was the best thing you learned about yourself this past year? And how will you apply that lesson going forward? (Author: Tara Weaver)

That I am much, much stronger than I ever thought I was. I already started applying this lesson, but when I'm tempted to think, "oh no, I can't" I just draw on my reserves and do it.

I also learned that I am an inspiration for some people. This thrills me so much when people tell me as it is very lonely being me. Here I am, doing my thing (weekly newsletter, blog, etc), and never getting feedback about anything so when someone tells me how something I said changed how they do things, it honestly blesses me.

It's that starfish thing - if I can just make a difference in one person's life, it's enough for me. But I have to know that. One day I felt compelled to write a rather unusual topic for the newsletter. It felt like I was speaking to someone and I asked the people to write and tell me.

Well, it was meant for one lady who wrote back with the loveliest email. I still have it on the other computer.

December 18 – Try. What do you want to try next year? Is there something you wanted to try in 2010? What happened when you did / didn’t go for it? (Author: Kaileen Elise)

I really, really want to travel internationally this year. I love travel so much. Wonderful Boss and I had lovely chats the past two weeks since we were the only ones in the office. One day we talked for about 30 mins on travel, what it is that compels us to do it, etc, etc.

The only thing I have just a smidgeon of regret about not doing this year is hiring a personal trainer. But that happens on Tuesday so I'm not too worried.

December 19 – Healing. What healed you this year? Was it sudden, or a drip-by-drip evolution? How would you like to be healed in 2011? (Author: Leonie Allan)

What healed me this year was Motherstyles. I know a lot of you think I'm crazy about this book (I am!) but for me, it's a big thing to know that I'm not alone. That book set me free to be the person I am and the mother I am for these babies.

Something else happened recently too but I'm not ready to share that yet. Another "I am not alone" moment that was quite a big aha for me.

In 2011, I would like to be healed of the open heart/ friendship thing. It is not me to feel so needy and I decided I'm done with that. I have decided on some boundaries to protect my heart and hope and pray that I'm strong and courageous enough to keep them firm.

Do I sound hard and callous?

December 20 – Beyond Avoidance. What should you have done this year but didn’t because you were too scared, worried, unsure, busy or otherwise deterred from doing? (Bonus: Will you do it?) (Author: Jake Nickell)

Probably just not going full force with my marketing efforts. Or not marketing smarter. I just didn't feel like I wanted to be too visible which is rubbish but, well, there it is. I'm being honest.

Then again, I am very proud of keeping to my time boundaries. I always feel like I practise what I preach and if I tell my clients to build a business around their dream life, then I need to be living that too, and in 2010, I definitely did.

December 21 – Future Self. Imagine yourself five years from now. What advice would you give your current self for the year ahead? (Bonus: Write a note to yourself 10 years ago. What would you tell your younger self?) (Author: Jenny Blake)

Gosh, 5 years from now I'll be 41. The babies will be 6! D and I will be married 21 years!

Hopefully the kind of advice I'd give myself would be similar to what I say to myself now. Things like...

• You are awesome just the way you are
• Continue speaking life and encouragement to others
• Celebrate every accomplishment, whether big or small.
  
• Life out loud.
• Don't be scared to take risks because a life lived on eggshells is one not worth living.
• Slow down, relax more.
  

BTW, I can't do this "write a note to your younger self" things - I am way too literal and have not a scrap of imagination.

Did any of those questions make you reflect on your own life?

Christmas 2010, in bullets

First of all, my children (!!!) are 18 months old today. They are walking, talking big kids - I can't believe it.

Look at them at 8 months. First visit to Gillooly's Farm - not very impressed - we're going to take them again later today. Hopefully this time they'll be excited by all the ducks.

So, Christmas, two weeks later.

• D and the kids were up early as is their custom while I slept late.
• They then came to wake me, all dressed, saying "mommy mommy" - too sweet.
  
• I really don't like lots of gifts as it all just becomes a blur of paper and craziness so we got them 3 small things each and called it a day.
• They also got things from my family on the Sunday before - a joint gift and one each (wooden toys which I love - I think I've found my weakness with toys).
• Also, clothes from my MIL (three weeks early because they were "holiday clothes" that couldn't fit them, but let's move along...) and presents from other people.
• We started with Caren's presents to them which was a big mistake as they were FULLY occupied for 20 minutes (and would have been longer if I didn't say that we needed to get moving), then ours, then another friend's.
• Normal breakfast and nap and then we dressed them like twins (matching, for the fun of it, in denim shorts and white t-shirts) and set off for Pretoria.
• I say this everytime but "how in the Sam Hill (my new thing I picked up somewhere in blogland. I say that with a bad Southern accent!) do people survive in that heat?!" My sister in law says "AIRCONS!" I would die.
• Connor is not interested in doing anything but walking around and my MIL got a bit iffy since he wouldn't come give her a hug and kiss. *sigh*
  
• Kendra on the other hand loves the loving and was quite content to sit with Granny and be loved on. Granny then wanted to feed K and was not amused when K started doing her new thing which is freaking out if you offer her any food she finds offensive. She swipes her hands in front of her (violently, I might add) and screams a bit. It was fun to watch someone else experience the craziness. I'm bad, I know.
• Connor sat next to me and ate mostly everything, roast potatoes, mealies and pumpkin being his favourites.
• Yes, they were in their little seats.
  
• My SIL's in laws are chain smokers (you have never seen anything like it) so one side of the table was the smoking side for her, hubby and his parents, and the other side was the non-smoking side for us and D's mom.
• Connor started coughing and I had to tactfully pull him away from the smoking side where he was walking around. Not fun because they don't realise that the smoke is bad for babies.
• Gifts! SIL never opens gifts in front of people but the rest of us opened ours. Loved them except for the babies' gift. They got a very noisy piano-type thing which they played with there... and then when we got home, it was conveniently misplaced :) No way in the Sam Hill (see, it's fun!) am I having all that noise in my sanctuary.
  
• Other than that, it was a lovely, lovely day but I'm very glad we decided to come home and sleep in our own beds.
  

My thoughts on Father Christmas/ Santa
I grew up with the notion of FC but I always knew he was a fictional character.

I'm sure there's nothing wrong with it/ him but for me, I first of all think he's a bit freaky (which child wouldn't be scared of a gigantic man with a big, white beard?!) and second of all, I want the kids to look to God, their father, for any gifts, not some man in a red suit. Or even us for that matter.

God is the only person who will not disappoint them and quite honestly, I have to trust Him to give me things too (tangible and intangibles); the sooner they learn that's the way it is, the better for them.

I know I sound like scrooge. Leave me be :)

Now for the pics...

Kendra opening Caren's gift. Notice the sandals. She loves these things (gift from MIL) with their oversized flowers and insists on napping in them. Well, I said to her, "I don't care as long as you sleep" and she slept 1 hr 30 so I now call them the magic shoes.

Connor finally got to the present. They LOVE these balls so much. Look at the cute baby hands.

Kendra sees the puppies we bought them. She loves that thing.

Connor loves the puppy too. BTW, these are the only dogs that will be allowed in my house until these kids are about 8 and can take care of animals by themselves.

On our way to Pretoria. Doesn't she look sweet? And first car ride facing forward! Of course, D's idea. I'm happy to keep her rear-facing because she's so tiny.

I really think I need to get this only one gift for each adult going for next year, where everyone's names are thrown in a hat and each person draws a name to buy for. It just takes off the pressure of having to find the perfect gift.

What do you do in your family?

Things that make me stupid excited

Every month when I read Megan's blog I keep thinking, "I really need to participate".

Only thing is I always remember these things in the shower or driving and just don't get myself organised enough to blog them in time. And then Megan blogs and I have other stuff I want to say for the next two days...and so on...

Anyway, better late than never, right?

1. stick-e-tags

I've tried googling but nothing comes up. Oh well - they are like post-it flags but in the shape of arrows with the arrowhead being the sticky part. I read with them next to me and if I need to think about/ blog about something I put a little stick-e-tag there. I bought mine at CUM books if anyone in SA is interested.

2. the cooler Jhb weather!

You know how much I love my grey skies. And we've been having unseasonably cool weather which I'm loving. I said to D a few days ago, "I can't WAIT til it's winter" and yes, I got The Look.

I've even been staying at work til 4 so I can gaze upon the gorgeousness that is a grey Jhb sky as I have the most fantastic views imaginable.

3. square plum-coloured bowls from Mr Price Home clearance table

I didn't know how much I'd love them til I bought them. Oh my!

I have plates the exact same colour and now they have friends :) I'm eating everything from these bowls - salads, cereal, pasta. It just makes me happy to see them.

4. my moo Mommy cards

They are so gorgeous I don't even want to use them. And look at the cute container :)

5. having no piles of ironing in my laundry

Now this makes me stupid excited!

I asked Nanny V if she knew of someone who could come work one day this week. She brought her cousin and voila! my piles of unironed clothes are gone. I hate having things standing around so I'm very, very excited.

Our usual cleaning lady, Nester (yes, it's her real name), is back on Tuesday, and will be coming once a week, so things should be back to normal. Also, she won't think I'm a total lazy person when she sees just the latest laundry for ironing.

What are you stupid excited about?

700, me time, some bullets and a question

I see this is post number 700 on this blog.

How did that happen?!

I love the idea of me posting 700 times, 344 of them last year! Even though I started my organising blog way before this one, there's only a difference of 63 posts between them.

Apparently I also have a lot to say about organising!

Moving along.

So D and I decided to take off 3 days once V was back, for some date time.

Doesn't that sound decadent?

He is still not well though... went to work on Mon after being sick the whole of last week, let them see him sick so he went to the doc, got booked off again and has told me he doesn't want to "run around town" with me and get sicker.

Fair enough.

I briefly contemplated cancelling my leave but I've decided to do some "me time" things, just like Cat did the other day.

I forgot to mention that last Thursday after supper I went to see Life as we know it all by myself and it was fabulous. Fabulous. I keep raving about this to anyone who will listen. TONS better than Eat Pray Love... Go see it!

Anyway, so tomorrow after I take down Christmas and quickly pack it away (15 mins max), I'll be doing a bit of window shopping and real shopping (tripod, some inspirational wooden things) and then going to have some quiet time with my laptop at a coffee shop. Heavenly!

I intend to write 3 organising posts and a couple for this blog too - I really need to finish the reverb things and Caren wants a post about Christmas :)

I would have gone to the hairdresser too but my one is on holiday and is only back on Tuesday.

And then, the bullets

• I've decided to take one last bash with the gift card so I made one phone call today. That's it though. I am not following up on it or on my other 20 emails to the pest control place. I am letting go... Only thing is... I feel I have to warn all those who live in Jhb, don't ever use Pest Control Experts - they are crooks - and go read hellopeter for the full story.
• My boss gave us (well, technically only me since I've been the only one back since Christmas) two photo frames as gifts - one is for the work side and one is for the personal side of your life. I've put one of the beach photoshoot pics in the one frame and since I couldn't decide what would represent work adequately, I've started making a vision board.
• While I was cutting from the magazines (very therapeutic, by the way), I decided to make the word COURAGE to stick on my very boring but useful, black Moleskine planner.

without flash...

with flash (why is flash so evil? I love it!)

And finally, the question:

Do any of you in the US know about the 3M command hooks that you can use to hang photos on the wall? They are marvellous (or so I've been told by my organising blog buddies). I've even written to 3M to ask them who in South Africa stocks them - nobody. So I've decided to ask for help.

Is anyone willing to buy me some packs and post them to me? I will pay for everything via Paypal - command hooks, postage, etc. And I will be eternally grateful!


What do you do for me time? How often do you take some?

P.S. Claudia, please email me - I want to talk "book" with you and have some publishing links to send you too. Thanks :)

Canvas-worthy

On a recent photo post, Laura and I were chatting behind the scenes via email.

She said she prints about 2 canvases of the 8000 pics she takes a year.

Do you know how much I love that ratio?!

Anyway, I asked her, “ how do you know?”

She said, “you will just know!”

And I think I got it.

I’ve decided I love the moody pics of us the best, not the smiley-smiley ones. And every time I look at this one, I think LOVE! So I decided on this one.

I was not wild about this one of the babies at first and then a chance conversation with my brother changed my perspective about all things photo when he said, “sometimes pics are not wow at first, and then when you start cropping they just get better” and that’s what happened here.

This is the original one...

I cropped D’s hands out and this is the one we’re having printed.

LOVE LOVE LOVE

I chose this second one because it’s so representative of the stage I love – the crawling. They’re babies yet independent and, best of all, mobile!

There are TONS of good, even great pics, but I’m getting to the point where I know which are “canvas-worthy”.

How do you choose which photos you’ll spend a lot of money printing?

A much better year, money-wise

I’m tying up budgets and whatnot for last year so I can close off my 2010 spreadsheet (don't laugh) and...

Last year we spent R60,148.67 on the babies.

This is over 12 months so basically R5,000 a month, which includes V’s salary and the two bonuses we gave her.

Compare that to 2009 when in a mere 6 months we spent a whopping R52,500.

Don't ask me how - I only know we weren't paying for IVFs so that's probably how. That and our work bonuses.

Things are indeed looking up.

Although this is the last year we'll have a small baby budget as the intention is to send them to preschool next year.

I'm hoping that we can start them in mid-2012 (they will be 3 in July. 3!) as every 6 months of savings helps.

What are you guys doing about pre-school?

When do you want to send your kid (s)?

Am I the only nerd thinking and planning the money?

What would you do?

There are two situations in my life which have been ongoing 1) for the last 5 months and 2) for the last 3 months.

1) I am fighting with my ISP as they incentivised me to renew my two-year contract with me by giving me a gift card. The gift card is supposed to be valid for a year - mine was only valid for 10 months and so has expired with R360 on it.

I can't get anyone to care and they are not a "company who responds" so they don't even respond on hellopeter.com.

2) I got a pest control company in to fumigate my house. Numerous tries later, the insects are still crawling around. After fighting with them for about a month (their services are guaranteed), they finally agreed to refund my money (R980). That seemed to be just a fob-off as I'm still waiting two months later, after numerous emails, phone calls, complaints on hellopeter, etc.

So, it's a new year and I don't feel like schlepping all this baggage around.

On the other hand, it is R1 340 ($203).

I'm very tempted to just let it go (you know I am bad at this - tenacious like a bulldog usually) for my peace of mind.

What would you do?

What do you think I should do?

Word for the year

I’ve been doing this word of the year thing for a number of years now.

Let me take you on my journey.

I’d had a very hectic business life in 2008.

I now see I was trying to stay busy to avoid the pain of infertility – this was uncovered in a coaching session.

I was also listening to a teleseminar and a woman said how she had a block against building her business because she didn’t know how she’d have time for kids in an already busy life.

Aha moment!

That was me. I was also so busy (yet organized) but didn’t know how I’d be able to have a child, yet I wanted one.

I then consciously started simplifying, delegating, getting un-busy so that I’d have the space (both physical and mental) for the child I wanted.

Coincidentally or not, that process happened between IVF 1 and the IVF 2 that resulted in C & K.

I found out I was pregnant on Christmas Eve 2008 and my main goal was staying pregnant and, once I discovered it was twins, taking home two alive babies.

And so, in 2009, my word was simplicity.

That worked really well as I simplified everything in my business (if you have a business, I am expert at helping you take out everything that you don’t want in a way that feels right for you - honestly), delegated everything that didn’t need my awesomeness and most importantly, I had my live, take-home babies.

Mission accomplished.

You know the craziness with newborn babies (and twins) and so when 2010 rolled around, I felt like I needed to get it all back on track.

My word for 2010 – consolidate.

Boring but very necessary.

I got my home into order, the babies on a schedule so they’re no longer kicking my butt, work is back on track and most things are consolidated.

Now that 2011 is here, it’s time to ramp up.

Step out into the big dreams and goals I’ve always had for my life.

And so my word for 2011 is courage.

My name means “brave and fearless” and I think that mostly, I am.

This year I want to act in the face of fear.

What that means for me is when I feel like shrinking, to step out and be visible.

When I feel scared, to do it anyway.

When I feel vulnerable and don’t want to risk being hurt, to connect anyway.

That’s courage for me.

To stop playing it safe.

So look out world – this year is going to be my best year ever!

I have big plans in mind that involve a book... *ahem*

What is your word of the year? Don’t think too hard, share the first thing that comes to mind.

P.S. When you see me shrink, remind me to act courageously. And if you find a pic or an article or a piece of jewellery that depicts courage, please point me towards them to inspire me.

P.P.S. I have a pic (which I need to go find on my discs of photos) taken when we went to Australia in 2006. It’s of me HIGH above the ground, on the Otway Fly, which I would have liked to post to represent courage. It’s the thought that counts, right?!

Weekly menu and a recipe - potato lentil curry

So I've decided to post my weekly menu.

It's all part of planning our meals as I'm going to start weighing my food again to work on my portion control. It's not about eating the wrong things with me; it's how much I love the carbs.

Oy!

I only do Mon - Fri since on weekends we finish up any bits and pieces and generally go light.

Since I often get this question, let me answer it here too.

Doing a menu plan does not hamper my spontaneity - I like being prepared and I switch the meals around (within the week) about 80% of the time because sometimes I've planned a salad-y meal and it's freezing, etc. And I'm not one of those people who can enjoy a salad on a cold night.

Monday
Chicken a la King, rice and carrots

Tuesday
Pasta with beef, tomato and spinach sauce; salad

Wednesday
Potato lentil curry, pumpkin and rice (my meat-free meal of the week)

Thursday
Spaghetti bolognaise and salad

Friday
Burgers and salad

And if you're interested, tomorrow for lunch I will have 1.5 slices/60g wholewheat bread, 100 g chunky low-fat cottage cheese with cucumber slices on top and, of course, salt and lots of pepper.


Right, onto the recipe.

Potato lentil curry
(no pics because it's not the prettiest meal in the world)

I found this recipe on a blog somewhere but alas, I don't have the link. I was lazy so I wrote it down instead of printing... I do remember the woman said her husband normally didn't like lentils and even he liked this. So if you know who that is (I googled and checked the first page and then again, got lazy), let me know and I'll add the link.

Found it! This is the link I saw

1 cup lentils
1 can coconut milk
1 Tsp curry powder (after experimenting I'd say the medium one works the best)
water
2 medium potatoes, peeled and diced
salt and pepper to taste

• Throw lentils into pot.
• Add 3.5 cups of liquid (coconut milk and water) - I like to be precise so for me that's 875 ml which means my 400 ml can coconut milk. I then use the same can and fill it with water and then another little bit.
• Add curry powder, cover and cook for about 20 minutes (a nice rolling bubble).
• Stay in the kitchen... the smell is DIVINE! Mmmmm.
• Stir, then add the potatoes, salt and pepper (for me it's about a level teaspoon salt - I don't like too salty), stir and cook uncovered for another 20 minutes.
• Stir frequently otherwise your potatoes might stick.
• At this point I taste, either add some more pepper or maybe cook another 10 minutes or so.

That's it.

Easy and very, very tasty.

According to the recipe, you should be able to eat it just like that with a dollop of plain yoghurt on top (YUM!) but I serve it over rice (as mine had quite a bit of liquid) with some veggies on the side.

(Like the blogger's husband, D is also not a huge fan of lentils but he loves this meal. Connor also eats it but Kendra hates it :)).

And just like that, the weekend's gone.

What are you eating this week? Do you eat lentils?

A brand new slate

nearly got run over by the car in the middle all in the name of getting a good photo!

Oh, how I love the new year.

Not so much the whole new year's celebration (it is DEAD boring in Jhb - someone please remind me next year to either (1) book a cruise or (2) host a NYE low-key party with friends) but the thought of having a clean slate to start again.

Of course, technically you can do that at anytime, and I often do, but there's nothing quite like a lovely new diary with fresh-smelling new paper, a new calendar to hang on the wall, all squeaky clean and glossy, and of course, a whole list of brand new goals.

I love it!

I was supposed to have lunch with my friend with the twins yesterday at 12 but she bailed and I was happy for that to happen as D and I had an afternoon date with a bookshop.

We are nerds and very proud of it.

So I took her home instead, collected D and off we went for lunch and a bookshop jaunt.

While we were at lunch we talked about our goals for this year.

Do you know what?

Without knowing mine, he said the same thing I said a few days ago - he wants to work on his relationship with me.

I love when we're in sync.

We decided to have two dates a month and already have our dates planned for Jan and Feb, and have already talked to the MIL to come babysit once a month. V will babysit for the second date every month.

D is reluctant to leave the babies so we can travel internationally (even for 5 days) but I'm working on that. He did suggest a 2-day thing locally first to ease into it. I'm all for travel so of course I said yes. (I've walked past a Flight Centre twice in the last two days and had to tear myself away from the Phuket "special" currently on - it's almost a crime not to go!)

At the bookshop I even picked up a book on how to spice things up romantically. Apparently 87% of moms admit they don't have s*x as often as they did before having kids. I'm in good company!

Anyway, back to goals.

I read LauraC's 2010 summary post this morning and I was SO inspired. I love seeing people LIVE BIG and go after their goals, "balls to the wall", as my friend Dee would say.

Laura, you'll be happy to know I categorised my list, I'm ready to make things happen and I'm declaring right now on the 1st Jan that this will be the Best Year Ever!

I don't do resolutions (I have written a whole article on this!) but I do goals.

How about you? Do you do goals? Do you do resolutions?

Share your link in the comments if you blogged about it otherwise go ahead and share in the comments.

Also, if you need help, tell me. Rebecca, I have not forgotten and will write a post on the one goal of yours hopefully this week :)

P.S. Hayley, what did you do for NYE? You always seem to have fun ideas. BTW, we need to make our coffee date :)

P.P.S. Today was a perfect day, weather-wise. GORGEOUS, grey skies. I actually jumped out of the car and made D wait while I took a couple of pics.

Reverb - week 2

At this rate, this reverb thing is only going to be finished around mid-Jan. I hope to do better than that, though...


December 8 – Beautifully Different. Think about what makes you different and what you do that lights people up. Reflect on all the things that make you different – you’ll find they’re what make you beautiful. (Author: Karen Walrond)

Hmmm, difficult question and I'm sure other people would say different things but the first thing that came to mind was that I always try to encourage others and that I genuinely take an interest in other people.

December 9 – Party. What social gathering rocked your socks off in 2010? Describe the people, music, food, drink, clothes, shenanigans. (Author: Shauna Reid)

I don't think anything "rocked my socks off" but I did enjoy Kirsten's baby shower the most this year. It was just so special to be hosting a baby shower for the most gracious person ever.

You can read more by clicking that link :)

December 10 – Wisdom. What was the wisest decision you made this year, and how did it play out? (Author: Susannah Conway)

Two come to mind...

One was to stop doing in-home organising sessions as I felt they took time away from my time with the babies.

The other was to rebrand. I feel so, so comfortable in my "new skin" with my brand spanking new website, photo and cards. And I do believe this positioned me well for the TV thing and much more in the new year.

December 11 – 11 Things. What are 11 things your life doesn’t need in 2011? How will you go about eliminating them? How will getting rid of these 11 things change your life? (Author: Sam Davidson)

5 of those things are kg I want to lose :)

The other 6? drama, clutter, commitments that don't serve me, stress, clothes that don't look good on me and some email lists.

The physical stuff is easy for me to let go of; for the kg, I plan to hire a personal trainer the minute they are back from their holidays and the emotional stuff I'm really going to ask myself the hard questions - how is this serving me? is this aligned with my life goals and values? etc.

Hopefully the end result is a leaner me living a simpler and even more fulfilling life.

December 12 – Body Integration. This year, when did you feel the most integrated with your body? Did you have a moment where there wasn’t mind and body, but simply a cohesive YOU, alive and present? (Author: Patrick Reynolds)

I always feel like I'm most integrated when I'm living my passion - so I'd say those moments when I'm coaching or speaking. Physically, when I'm playing with the babies and we're all having good family time. It's the small moments really. Like today, just playing and laughing with Kendra who is pulling out all the cuteness lately.

December 13 – Action. When it comes to aspirations, it’s not about ideas. It’s about making ideas happen. What’s your next step? (Author: Scott Belsky)

My next step is to choose which goals I'm going to work on in the next 90 days and get to it.

Relationship with D - we've already planned dates for Jan and Feb

Weight - you know about the personal trainer. Am already eating better and will go back to gym next week, and...

I'm writing a BOOK!

Also thinking about buying a sewing machine to do REALLY simple things, like hemming jeans and sewing straight-edged items. How much do they cost these days anyway?

December 14 – Appreciate. What’s the one thing you have come to appreciate most in the past year? How do you express gratitude for it? (Author: Victoria Klein)

Sleep! Honestly, that's it. I kept thinking month in and month out, "surely this is the month they will start sleeping better" and eventually at 10 months it happened.

And I am oh-so-grateful, I can't tell you. I'm even more grateful that we didn't get used to it and then it went due to teething and illness. They sleep like logs now.

That's enough for now!

Are you reverbing? Share your links in the comments so I can come read your post (s).

P.S. These pics and the previous beach pics are from the beach photo shoot

So let's talk about food and eating issues

Julia, if you're reading - no email address came through on your comment so I couldn't send you the link. Email me on marcia @ the123blog dot com and I'll sort you out :)

******************************

There are two parts to this post - my views on the eating thing and then how these views seem to offend 90% of the population.

Let's start with my views, shall we?

I have very clear ideas (no kidding!) about what my kids can and can't eat.

• No sugar
• No added salt
• No sweets - will allow the very occasional biscuit (cookie), cake (without icing) or muffin
• No chocolates
• No cooldrinks - juices diluted 1:3 and only about 100 ml a day. Water the rest of the time. (K actually flings the juice away - yes, we're working on the manners - because she prefers water like I do)
  

I know they technically can eat these things from a year onwards (and some people do even before that) but I'm of the opinion that if they don't know what they're missing, why mess with that?!

They're perfectly happy living in their sugar-free lives and I am living proof that sugar is very addictive. Once you start, it's hard to stop.

And God has provided lots of natural sugar in fruits. I still maintain there is nothing quite as good as a Granny Smith apple - seriously. Yummy! Or a juicy orange, mango or pineapple. Yum! And they eat plenty of fruits and raisins as snacks.

I also am not going to be a short-order cook whipping up many different meals so I have a rule for the babies - you can eat what I provide (and there are always choices within that meal - like carbs, protein, vegetables and fruit) or have a dry Provita.

Life is about choices, after all.

Sometimes they choose the Provita and happily eat carrots and some Provita instead of my (lovingly cooked) meal, which is fine with me. Honestly. There are some nights I also only want a slice of toast with a cup of soup, so I get it.

Also, you all know there is an obesity problem the world over due to overeating/ eating incorrect foods and lack of exercise. There is also a rise in childhood obesity and I just don't think that current trends of bad eating will help that problem go away.

I'm not entirely happy about my weight (those last 3 kg have to go next year - watch this space!) but mostly it doesn't define who I am - I know that that's about 5% of who Marcia is. And I don't talk about weight in front of the kids or much in front of D either. I don't think I have issues in this area besides the "who wouldn't love thinner thighs?" thing. LOL

Besides all that, a you just feel better when you eat better. Again, I'm living proof of that. I was on weigh-less in 2006 to lose a few kgs and never felt better. I still eat mostly the same (except for the odd cake now and again) and when we're away and are eating more junk than usual, I feel more sluggish and blah. That's why I tell everyone, go to Thailand for a holiday - the food is fantastic, healthy and you will look and feel great.

So that's all the background.

I'm fully aware that I'm unusual being so vigilant about what my babies eat and that 90% of those reading probably disagree with me. Have at it!

But I'm their mother and I honestly know this is best for them.

So I get really ticked off when...

• people sneak "fun" food to the kids thinking it's cute
• go on and on and on about how "deprived" the kids are
• give me The Look and shake their heads
  

I do make different choices from a lot of people for my life and I don't tell them, "what you're doing is wrong for your life or kids" so why do they feel the need to tell me how wrong I am to feed my kids only healthy, nutrititious food.

I don't rip that sweet from your child's hand and give them an apple slice instead. Don't sneak chips and sweets to my kids.

Maybe it's that they think I'm depriving the kids of fun?

In the writing of this post, I just realised that I now have good answers ready when people ask me food questions or give me The Look.

"Don't say "shame" - they eat healthy, nutritious food 99% of the time. They are BLESSED!" :)

I realise I'm extreme but I'm very comfortable living on the edge of normal. But where on the spectrum do you fall?

My number 1 goal for next year

I spent much of today doing my annual review of my business and personal goals. Sobering stuff but not all bad.

Which is why it's so good to get things down.

My mind had made things worse than they were... maybe I'll share that in another post?

Anyway, my number 1 goal for 2011 is to reconnect properly with D, get our s*x life back and just have our fabulous marriage back where it used to be.

What's your number 1 goal?

Now I'm going to throw out last year's calendar and rubbish on my desk and pretty it up. I deserve a break after all that hard "work", don't I? :)

Back to work

Last night I suddenly realised that I had ONE day before going back to work.

I made a list TWO pages long of things I wanted to do.

Somehow I got stuck into one of those items (sorting out my project 365 photos) and I'm nearly there.

Apologies for those of you who are friends with me on FB for the gazillion updates (my photo blog goes to FB automatically).


Tomorrow V is back from holiday (I hope!), that's if she arrived safely back from Zim.

My messages to her have been undelivering... so hopefully all is well.

D and I feel like rock stars because even to my very objective self, we've coped beautifully with not a stitch of help from anyone, and with sick babies. D is also sick and is going to the doctor tomorrow to get a sick note since he's also supposed to be back at work.

Oy!

Anyway, so we've been with the babies for 18 days on the trot.

The longest since my maternity leave for me, and he has never spent this much time with them.

The time with the babies and as a family has been so good - they are so, so cute, can communicate their needs and are generally 70% good, 30% spirited/ sassy. Which D constantly reminds me is what I prayed for as I said 100% good kids are boring.

Those words have come back to bite me...

The one thing I will not miss is feeding time. That's a post for another time but also the cleanup afterwards is just terrible. And I'm not lazy about cleaning.

Work it out - 18 days X 5 meals X 2 kids = way too much cleaning up

I have a confession - I've been skipping the afternoon snack for the last few days so that there's one less meal to clean up.

!

How V does it I don't know.

I guess you keep going because of the cuteness?

Anyway, my deadline is 10 pm tonight so off I go to get my beauty sleep :)

Have you made your menu plan for the week?

P.S. I write quite a popular blog on organising - if you're interested in following that one, leave a comment and I'll send you the link.

Excuse the blurry Christmas pics

See, here's why you need to download immediately and check the quality.

I am about a month late and am way too lazy to go around the house again, taking more pics.

Here's a collage...just because I've been playing in Picasa...

this is how I display my Christmas cards - pegged to a piece of ribbon. Looks very pretty when it dangles... is it me, or are people sending out fewer cards every year? We got 10 total and of those, 2 are from blog friends (thanks!), 1 from my coach :), 3 from family, 1 from pastors, 3 from friends. I sent out about 40.

the babies' stockings, not that I put anything in there or that I "do Santa" (topic for another post). look carefully... see the 3 candles in the middle of the two stockings? the beige ones were holding the stockings in place until Connor pulled at the stocking and the candle whacked him on the forehead - so D made another plan (Prestik)

angel from my friend, Roz :) poor thing had to perch on such a tiny tree but she did well, the angel, not Roz.

half the things are off the tree thanks to my little boy's exploring hands

this little guy lives on the babies' room door handle - Kendra loves this thing. She squeals with delight when we give it to her for hugs at every nappy change.

for this I consider myself pure genius, just MONTHS too slow. So simple and yet so powerful - red ribbon prevents the babies from getting into my sideboard, finally :)

I bought these hanging decorations last year, on a whim, for R20 each ($3). I got 2 that say Love and 2 that say Hope. When I went back, they were GONE. Out of stock. So glad I got them. I love them so much they stay up year round. Connor loves them too :)

that's our teeny-tiny Christmas tree. As a friend said, you just have to get used to "decorating UP"

this was me being creative. I saw something similar on one of these decorating blogs (which I'm addicted to, by the way, but only the imperfect ones).


this tiny tree used to live on my work desk til I couldn't be bothered anymore to be "that person" who always "does the celebrations". Again, a story for another post but I realised they don't take you seriously if you become defined by being that person... I made it festive, put it on a lovely mosaic platter that I never use and voila!


And that's it! I basically only "decorate" (and I use that word very, very loosely) the lounge and open-plan entrance way/ dining room area.

On a scale of 1 - 10, I'd consider mine a 6.

Do you go ALL out? What's your number?

P.S. We went to the pharmacy instead and got some medicines. Connor has already had a coughing fit since going to sleep at 6 pm; not a peep from Kendra.

I think we're off to Casualty.

This is a bad weekend to get really sick. All the doctors are closed all of yesterday, today and tomorrow (all public holidays here in South Africa) and I can't wait anymore.

It feels like overkill because it's just a hacking cough (both, C worse) and nose pouring liquid (K) but it's either that or the pharmacist. And we've been doing cough syrup and Nurofen for days and days now.

Last night I waited up until I was too tired to keep my eyes open (11:20) because Connor was hacking away terribly. I had this fear that he'd stop breathing...

I am a total rule-follower with medicines and safety issues as there is no way I'm going to add feeling guilty to the mix of other emotions if something happens that is a side effect from over dosing.

So I picked him up, rocked him a bit and then he throws himself sideways which is his signal for "enough now, I want to go back to sleep".

I need to get dressed quickly so we're ready when they wake from their morning nap for our exciting post-Christmas adventures :)

On the bright side, we've now taught Kendra to wipe and blow her own nose. Those little hands are very cute.

Merry Christmas from South Africa

I decided to forgo a longer blog post tonight because I've been tidying my study - I'm about 10 minutes from done.

Good times!

No, really, because I can't stand the mess anymore.

So, from the four of us here in Johannesburg, Merry Christmas to you and your family.

May the love of Jesus surround you this festive season.

P.S. It is blazing hot here - it's 10:49 pm and I'm still in shorts with the windows wide open :)